i posted a few weeks ago about our very merry minimalist christmas and i got a lot of messages/inquiries about what exactly that is so i thought i would share.
i have always suffered from anxiety and crippling fear. when i was 11 i convinced myself that i was going to get raped and kidnapped and would announce to my family at the dinner table that i had survived another day, but i wasn't sure about tomorrow. sounds crazy huh? well it was. my mom, ever the believer in homeopathy, would pour "rescue remedy" down my throat to chill me out and as i got older she added a cold glass of chardonnay to the routine. my fear and anxiety has never gone away, but i have learned to identify what triggers me, and when it comes to my anxiety nothing sets me off more than STUFF. whether it's a pile of magazines, trash bags haphazardly stored under the kitchen sink, or a counter that needs to be cleared, STUFF drives my anxiety through the roof. when we knew we were going to have a baby, and STUFF was inevitable, my loving husband said "honey let's pretend like it's 1980 and only buy what we absolutely positively need. no bells and whistles." so that's what we did - i tried my best to register for the items that didn't take up a lot of space, could be easily stored, and were very very basic. that's not to say we didn't end up with three strollers, and i didn't buy every single thing that assured me my baby would sleep after a few months of sleepless nights (guess what, nothing worked), but we avoided a lot of stuff by asking ourselves "how long will we use this? did our parents have it? will this be easy to store for a second baby?"
then we decided to buy a tiny house. i'm talking TINY. our house had recently been flipped so everything was brand new and just our style - we looked at it as an investment property assuming we would move when our family grew and easily find renters because it's in a great location and is sweet as can be. it is old (so no closet space) and it is smaller than our first apartment in chicago. and honestly? i love it. i love that everything in our house has a purpose, i love that we aren't heating/cooling space that isn't getting used, and that eily doesn't have a shitload of junk in her room. we rotate toys every month or so and she's still at the age where this "BIG SURPRISE" of new toys is greeted with pure excitement even though they're old toys she forgot about. i'm also a big fan of the montessori method of learning which embraces "less is more" and serves as a nice guide for toys that serve many purposes. clothes are the next big hurdle for us, and i am currently working on sorting through everything i own so i have a wardrobe of just 40 pieces (20 for spring/summer and 20 for fall/winter) and will be donating or selling what i don't absolutely positively love/feel good in. i stronly believe living with less is not only good for my mental health but it's beneficial to eily's developing brain, and i know it's amazing for mother earth as the less we buy, the less trash we produce.
so...where does that leave us for things like christmas/birthdays? i ask my family to gift eily with "experiences" over toys. a membership to the children's museum, a month of gymnastics class, and if there is something they want to buy i try and push them for things that will get us outside (like the little house she got for her 2nd birthday!) or open ended toys. pat and i rarely buy gifts for each other and when we do, we go the experience route too. one year we went and saw the packers/redskins play. this year we are going to see dave matthews (a little BABY!) in charlottesville with friends, and i've asked him not to get me anything for my birthday/anniversary/valentines for a few years so i can eventually buy a diamond/sapphire band to add to my engagement and wedding rings.
if you're interested in learning more from the experts here are some good reads:
The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up
Simplicity Parenting
The Year of Less
The Minimalist Home - I haven't read this one but LOL at it being #1 in Hoarding Addicition and Recovery
May I suggest you check your local library or buy the kindle version versus purchasing a hard copy because you know....STUFF!!!!!!!!!
