that girl could write. (and direct)

this week we lost ms. nora ephron and to be quite honest, it felt like losing someone that you once knew a very long time ago, but hadn't thought of for ages. i was much too young to appreciate her movies when they first premiered, but i found great comfort in my late teens, watching them all and knowing that it was ok to be a highly verbal, slightly neurotic, bright, feminine woman who isn't always ladylike, but is terribly funny. 


she closed her book, "i remember nothing," with two lists: one of things she will miss, the other a list of what she won't. here are my responses to those same lists:


What I Won't Miss
body odor
dry skin
burning rice
bras

losing sunglasses

high heels
the anxiety i feel over the potential of lost luggage
open windows on a highway
moving
the day after Christmas

facebook

junk email

junk mail

junk

What I Will Miss

my patricio

my polly girl

shopping for a new favorite dress

finding my new favorite dress

movie trailers

spring

fall

winter

summer

butter

driving on (a traffic-free) lakeshore drive, early in the morning, in january

seersucker anything
new years eve
chicago
champagne

ice cold chardonnay

thai food

"dinner with friends in cities where none of us lives" - i stole this from nora

summer to do

there are so many exciting new things going on around me that it has become my normal to receive good news from different friends across the country, on an almost weekly basis. i catch myself dreading the day that someone isn't getting engaged, getting married, having a baby, buying a house, getting into grad school, or any of the other fun surprises that have dominated my 20s. and i realize that taking the time to worry about a future that may or may not be as exciting as my present, takes away from me living in the now. and so right now, right this very second, i am excited about summer. i am excited that i have a best friend getting married in just two weeks (!!!!!!). i am excited that my parents and daniel will be visiting ross, patrick, polly, and myself in july. i am excited that for the first time in 5 years, i can jump in the car and visit my oldest and closest friend, cheyenne. but i dont want to get carried away with all this excitement and not actually do anything, so here are a few things that i absolutely want to accomplish before labor day weekend.

1. finish all the books on my kindle. brace yourself, i went on a e-book buying spree when i first got my kindle. i was then completely "distracted" by the 50 shades of grey trilogy and unable to read the books that i've been meaning to get to for a while:
• Whatever It Takes: Geoffrey Canada's Quest to Change Harlem and America
• Unbroken: A World War II Story of Survival, Resilience, and Redemption
• Loving Frank
• Cutting for Stone
• In the Garden of Beasts
2. get back into yoga. i lost all my post-college weight (thanks highlawn for your $1 pitchers, and dave's taverna for your french fries, but NO THANKS!) eating basically vegan and taking yoga, and while i don't think you can cut out cheese when the love of your life is from wisconsin, i do want to get back to the yoga. i hate exercise, but for whatever reason, i really really enjoy yoga.
3. get a tan. stop laughing.
4. visit cheyenne and joey
5. see anna maria island*

*and a few of you may know why.


so happy summer to all!

the month of may

five years in a row, may has been my yearly reminder that another year of adulthood had passed. i am another year removed from my beloved james madison university, my hilarious and insane memories of college are just a bit more blurry, and by no fault of my own, i am a bit more responsible. but this year, this may, i realized just how young i still am. just how much more i have left to enjoy and celebrate and experience.

i officially left chicago - my home away from home. and maybe never ever again in my life will i live somewhere that i so fiercely feel is "mine" but i am so lucky to have a place on a map that means so much to me. to have lived in a city, and realized that little corner of the world was meant to be a part of my life - and that i will forever beam with pride and nod in agreement when someone gushes about what a fantastic place it is.

i started a new job! and i love it. and it's so completely different than what i've been doing for the last five years, and that is okay. i am okay with learning new things, and being a little bit scared, and still being pushed by a little voice in my head that reminds me, "your life's passion lays in doing good work for others."

one of my dear, dear, dear friends said "yes" to the love of her life, and they are getting married! and i am so thrilled for her, for them, and for all the blessings that will come their way as man and wife. five years ago, i don't know if i was mature enough to realize the sacrafice, and the devotion that goes into a marriage - i'm not quite sure i full grasp it now. but i'm grateful to be surrounded by women who have each taken their own pace to the altar. and aren't looking at the rest of us, mouthing "hurry up!" as they go.

"damn homie, you're ENGAGED!"

muchos gracias amigas

the lewis-heckel family is settling in wonderfully. we are thrilled to share the same nest for the first time since january and are slowly falling back into our usual routine

...now if only our furniture would arrive.

i am fairly certain my handful of best girlfriends are the only ones who check this little corner of the interweb but thank you, thank you, thank you for all of your well wishes, texts, calls of encouragement, and support over these last few months. i'm the luckiest.

a love letter

dear chicago,

like all real love stories, ours began with one simple choice. i decided, completely on a whim, that i did not want to move to washington, d.c. after i graduated. to this day, i can't really explain why, other than the fact that i just knew in the bottom of my heart, that my adult life was not waiting for me in our nation's capital. and so, after lots of planning, a few google searches, and restless nights filled with thoughts of "oh my god what am i doing?", i moved to a city where i knew no one. i was 22 years old, i was 1200 miles from my family and my best friends, and i had nothing more than 3 suitcases and my very favorite purple longchamp. (RIP!)

to say it was love at first sight would be a lie. i was overwhelmed - my "extensive" research of random google image searches didn't prepare me for the fact that chicago is actually a huge city. i got lost constantly. i didn't have a car. i wasn't used to public transportation. it was hot. my roommates were strangers. on my third day of work, a 1st grader asked me in all earnest, "why are you so white?" what was this winter i kept hearing about, and how in the world could you wear two pairs of pants to work? what exactly is lake effect snow? why are there signs that said "if the snow is over 5 inches, you cannot park here." uhhhhhh, people drive when there were more than 5 inches of snow on the road?!?!?!?!

and despite all of these worries, and concerns and second guessing, "will this work out" i fell in love with you. i love you because you are a massive city that never ceases to surprise me. i love you because you are beaten down by relentlessly cold and unbearable winters and yet you provide the most wonderfully mild summers one could ask for. i love you because you offer BYOB restaurants, a beautiful skyline, clean streets, and the most beautiful christmas season i have ever seen. five years later, i stumble upon a neighborhood, a restaurant, a bar, a festival, a concert, something new that i've never seen but would love to try.  i love you because you are home to millennium park, the magnificent mile, buckingham fountain and goose island's 3-1-2. i love you because you provided me the opportunity to live in a championship city, to see oprah winfrey live, and while i didn't vote for him, i will always remember how unified and proud chicago was as obama was elected to be our president. i love you because you didn't get the olympics, and so the world will not have the opportunity to ridicule you and criticize you for your shortcomings. i love you because you are a big city with a small town feel. you are inhabited by nice, sincere, polite, and genuine people, all of who feel extremely fortunate to call you home. i love you because you have blessed me with some of the truest friends i will ever have, and at the foundation of our love for each other, is our shared love for you.

i love you because you were the setting for where i fell in love with the man i share my life with. the backdrop to the beginning of our story happens to be the most beautiful and marvelous place we've had the pleasure of inhabiting, and for that, we will be forever grateful.

and so i leave you, just short of five years of our meeting. we have had ups, and we have most certainly had downs, but like all love stories, i know that i will slowly forget the bad, and embellish the good. thank you chicago, for being one of the truest loves i have ever had. i will miss you so.